American Beauty

Hey Lovies....it's been a rough couple of weeks around here. I got laid off from my job or made part-time on-call (whatever the hell that means), I have been playing the "will you please pay your child support" game and all kinds of crappy stuff. Then to top it off my poor son spent his first real Easter in the ER with the stomach flu (which I ended up catching). I was looking out of the window of my office at my new job (yeah...I bounce back quick lol) and I noticed that it was raining. It has been sunny all day long and then out of nowhere it started to rain. Normally, my reaction would just be, "Oh shit...it's raining...and I don't have my umbrella". Today was different. Just looking at that rain made me appreciate all the beauty in the world. The way the rain hit the trees and they swayed around like they were dancing to the sound of the wind. The sound of car tires splashing in fresh puddles. It all made me happy to be alive. Happy to be experiencing that moment. I have decided it is time for me to stop focusing on all that is going wrong and focus on what is going right. It wasn't until I saw my son go into shock on Sunday that I realized that I never really appreciated the fact that he had always been healthy. I never thought I would long to hear him bust open my bedroom door and yell "Hey Mama". When I daughter had the worst asthma attack I had ever seen her have, I couldn't wait for her to ask me for the millionth time for a snack. We take these little moments for granted worrying about all the big things. XOXO!