Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Pay it Forward

Today was a comedy of errors to say the least. As I was going about my daily "mom duties" of getting the kids and myself out of the house, I lost my balance (I was wearing heels AND carrying Chunk) and I took a pretty bad tumble. I went ahead to work, thinking the pain would subside. My right foot only hurt briefly, but my left began to hurt more and swell. By the time I arrived at my office I could not put any weight on my left foot at all. Long story short my ankle is sprained and I was told to stay off of it for 48 hours. Here comes the hard part: I am a mother. A single mother at that. Who was going to make dinner and give my youngest a bath. How would laundry get done? I took a moment to think about what I say to people ultra married to their careers. The job will be there when you get back. For me this means the laundry will still be there, Miss Beasley bathed Chunky and I was able to make a meal that was satisfying and nutritious. If I am not healthy then I can't be the best mom I can be, so it's best to take it easy the best way I can.

Thanksgiving is approaching and I can't wait to see all of my family together. We are small in number but big in love. I fuss about them sometimes but I wouldn't trade them for the world!

Speaking of Thankgsiving, I flashback to this time last year when J and I were on very early stages of our relationship. I thought it was cute how he shared his plans (Going to see a Prince Tribute band) and updated me on his Thanksgiving activities. To be honest it was his message to me inquiring about my blog hiatus that prompted me to write a post that day. What a difference a year makes. Things aren't that bad but he gave me some info to let me know I may not be the one. He was straight up and told me he didn't know if he could deal with all my "extra." Ouch. I know now that need to pull back a little because something about that message, gave me the inclination that long term with me may not be something he can deal with and you all know I live for reciprocity. I don't want to get hurt, so I just need to keep those words in mind.

The New Year is coming up and I have a few small freelance assignments I am pursuing. The thing I am most excited about is my recent opportunity to Volunteer with the Woman's Alliance in Washington, DC. This weekend I watched a move titled, "The Other City" and I was blown away. The story that touch me most was that of J'Mia Edwards, a 32 year old single mother living with HIV. I found her story so touching because she is a single mother and I can't imagine how hard that can be especially when you battling disease. So instead of sitting my perch and saying, "How dreadful," I decided to get out there to urge women to practice safe sex and explain all the options available.

Well it's time for me to get some sleep! xoxoxo

Saturday, November 17, 2012


What a day!!!! This morning I had the pleasure of watching my daughter graduate from College for Kids, her college prep class she takes on the weekend. My inner thug was murked a little while I watched her come across the stage in her cap and gown. She is so eager to go to college and I pray she keeps that enthusiasm. I just don't want her to get caught up like I did.

After her graduation we (my parents came from out of town) went to the outlet and finished up with dinner nearby. Later my Aunt and my God brother came by and they all reminisced on their time in Guam and my children were in seventh heaven playing with my God brother. So in mid conversation, my aunt ask me what I need for my new abode, she wanted to give me some housewarming gifts. I started listing a few odds and ends and her and my mom split the list and there you have it. As we drove back from Target, I began to think about all the years and energy I have spent on my quest to feel loved. I will be honest and say 90% of the foolish things I have done were because I wanted someone to love me. Well tonight I stepped back from staring at the single tree and looked at the forrest. I HAVE BEEN LOVED THE WHOLE TIME!!! Every time my mom was there for me when people cried, "Let her fall", that was love. When my aunt opened her home to me for free when I first got here, that was love. When Tee and Red Velvet call because they sensed I was feeling down, that was love! I could sit here all night and go over all the times I was shown love, but I was to blind to see it!!! I'm out here searching and doing the most for something I already have. I will probably have a good soul cleansing cry tonight because this is a major revelation for me. Time to turn in, my baby is running her first 5k in the morning, and I have some cheering to do!

Sunday, November 11, 2012

Chapter Thirty Two

It has been a minute since I've posted because I have been INSANELY busy. The hard work was worth it because, last night J threw me a party that was one for the BOOKS!!!!! We started the night out at Georgia Browns and the food was delicious!!! After we ate he had the waiter bring me a champagne float, which was raspberry sorbet and champagne. It was simply delicious, and the cornbread with the lemon butter were to die for! I will certainly be back for brunch. After dinner, we picked up one of his friends and we headed to the club. When we got there everything was first class all the way. No wait in line and when we got to our table, he turned to me and asked me what kind of bottles I wanted. Now y'all know inside I was doing a shimmy shake and throwing glitter. I got two bottles of Ciroc, and when they brought them out I was pleasantly surprised! They had sparklers on top and those bottles were HUGE! We had a nice sized group and it was more than enough. I'm a poor historian at this point, because once we started the cirocumentary everything was a blur. I do remember doing the "Rick James" on the couch and trading rap lyrics with J (sweet). We did not leave until 3am and collapsed into bed and....you know the rest, lol. It was a good time and J really did a good job putting everything together. He made sure everything was just right. The night was special and perfect in every way.

I had more I wanted to post, but Miss Page is exhausted and I need some recovery time, lol. Peace....